tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26026020454758261002024-02-08T08:50:11.460+08:00silent tête-à-tête...!!the world as I get byLost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-27738719962455047622011-08-30T17:45:00.000+08:002011-08-30T17:45:44.569+08:00The diary of a nobody - Day 1<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-MY</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/> <w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/> <w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/> <w:Word11KerningPairs/> <w:CachedColBalance/> <w:UseFELayout/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--> <m:smallfrac m:val="off"> <m:dispdef> <m:lmargin m:val="0"> <m:rmargin m:val="0"> <m:defjc m:val="centerGroup"> <m:wrapindent m:val="1440"> <m:intlim m:val="subSup"> <m:narylim m:val="undOvr"> </m:narylim></m:intlim> </m:wrapindent><!--[endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><b><u><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS";"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">30<sup>th</sup> August 2011 –</span><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";"> <span> </span>Today on the very first day of Raya eve I’ve decided to challenge myself to write a diary for myself...maybe not consistently; honestly, as I am not a consistent person and never be one either. So with a dismal hope , I will<span> </span>try my best to commit for 30- days diaries writing challenge. Lol. Its kind of awkward to suddenly update your blog after a year of absence.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">This might not have been my very first attempt. I first start writing a diaries at a very young age when I was 10 but decided to stop due to an unpleasant experience or so if I recall.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">What is the use of diaries? I kept pondering.....</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">A diaries might be handy for someone who is as forgetful as me. A diaries is like a treasure chest that kept your thought and memories but unfortunately this is not like a Aladdin or Sinbad tales where the treasure chest is safely guarded by a scary monster and hidden in a sunken caves deep in the desert or forest.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">Be warn that your diaries are very much accessible to your surrounding people...be it your families, friends , loved ones or cats... meowww..purr</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">and if in any chance this people read through your diaries and figure out the real thought or feelings you have on someone or on a particular subject/ event........you’ll be doomed.........you’ll be embarrassed to the point that you hope the messenger of death will just come over and take your life....whoossshh... (coz it’s a sin to kill yourself....lol)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">Well, when I first wrote my diaries no one had given me any caveat and eventually I let a friend read mine ..... and until now I just can’t forget the expression and the laughter that burst out. OMG........I feel like dying that time...my face turn as red as cherry those day when I was fairer..(now da gelap mcm negro).... (= _ =)> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">On a second note, it might also muddled up your relationship with your diaries subject. Imagine if the same person who you writing are about are the one who read your diaries.... <span> </span>ohhh...scary!!!...and embarrassing still...</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">So now as a matured and grown up girl turning to woman (unlikely)....Ive came up with few <b><u><span style="color: red;">solutions and rule for diaries writing</span></u></b> :-</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><ol><li><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";"></span><span style="color: red; font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";"><span></span></span><span style="color: red; font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">Never reveal your own or anyone identities on your diaries (don’t even try to use a real name, or even share your background like workplace or residential area )</span></li>
<li><span style="color: red; font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">Go for e-diaries it is much more safer than having them lying around the house. (Lock your laptop all the times to avoid privacy invasions)</span></li>
</ol><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">A simple rules that might keep your relationship healthy despite whatever complaint or comment you wrote on them unknowingly.......hehe!!</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">I know I sounds stupid...u dont have to imply it ...haih </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Lucida Calligraphy";">Well, I haven’t take any bath yet and so latter guys!!</span></div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-72416979078288865682010-08-23T00:01:00.003+08:002010-08-23T00:15:07.248+08:00--------- L---------O-------S--------T---------<div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">Month had pass and a lot of things is going......thesis - correction - jobless - work - convo - grad - work back - work sucks...(T___T)....simple yet its a long story and I'm a lazy person who is even more lazier to type...</span><br />
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<div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">Just to mark this again......I'm officially a graduate from University Malaya.........yeay!!..(alhamdulillah)...its done but the road does not end but instead it started here....If before I was on a lane or a federal road....now I'm about to enter the highway and destination is something that you must be clear with...........</span></div></div><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: small;"><br />
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<div style="color: red; font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>b'coz u noe why??...</b></span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">1. highway is a oneway track....</span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;">2. is a fast pace world...gotta be carfull not to be too caught up </span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">3. the next junction is far n u will get into a sticky situation (STUCK3x!!)</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">4. wasted..( ur life is not a waste to be dump...fail or lost and u will pay in pain)</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">First off, I ought to extend my highest regards and thanks to all d people involve in making it possible for me to hold d ''mock scroll'' 4th of August 2010. All my thanks and gratitude goes to Allah the almighty, my parents, my siblings, my friends, my teachers, faculty staff and also the ptptn guy who approve the loan ( tho soon I might get a call from them due to payment negligence ....hehehe).</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">Before the convo I was all hyped about the future. I had a vision set in mind. I had a dream. I thought I knew where I was going all along. But now when I look back I felt kinda scared and not sure bout myself. Getting a job is one thing but getting a good paid job or a passionate job is another thing. What more on the confusion whether to continue the study and the hope off d far future on starting a business on my own......</span></div><div style="color: red; font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red; font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Now that u r more exposed to reality I can say this.....money-honey...where r u??</b></span></div><div style="color: red; font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Bwahahahahaha</b></span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">At 23 in age of course I don't have the privilege to squander notwithstanding the circumstance....I opt to be more practical and see how things will go...lucky flexibility is one of my many robustness....</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="color: red; font-size: small;"><b>It’s time to get your head out of the sand. </b> </span> <span style="color: red; font-size: small;"><b>The days where all you needed was a college degree to get a job are LONG GONE.</b></span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Just because you got a degree or graduate from a prestigious university, it doesn’t entitle you to a six figure job, with full benefits, a one month paid vacation to a company retreat,a corner office, and a parking spot in front of the doors with your name on it. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span><br />
<div style="color: red; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b> Dream on if you think </b></span></div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>high paying job will fall squarely into your lap. </b></span></div><div style="color: black; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: black; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">So plish think back on the graduation. Remember your fellow classmates graduating with you? They too got degrees. Now, think of the thousand other graduations across the nation that occurred in the same month and year. </span> <span style="font-size: small;">They got degrees too. </span> <span style="font-size: small;">What’s going to separate you from them? Why should employers hire you instead of all the other clones? </span> <span style="font-size: small;">You must learn to differentiate yourself. What can you offer that these other people can’t?<b> </b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><span style="font-size: small;">Yes, I can fairly said that experience is important and so is the other soft skills u had taken up in r entire educational life. Build your confidence, polish up your brain, mouth, hand and legs,and do be extra wiser in choosing a suitable career for your own sake. Be smart people!! Stay awake and rise up from your college daze...</span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span><br />
<div style="color: red; text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: small;">Because there are the smart people out there... </span></b></div><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">the ones who had not been affected by this "college daze", and made sure the time they spent in school would separate them from the students who were still “asleep”. </span> <span style="font-size: small;">You know exactly who these smart people are. They're the ones who took the internships, the unpaid jobs, who made network contacts, and spent their days and nights gaining valuable working experience and marketable skills. Or there are people who had work extra hard to gain compromising academic results to open up a course towards higher academic opportunity and there are aso people who spent their night sleepless sending thousand of applications in order to secured a job faster than you. </span></div><span style="font-size: small;">Im not writing these for anyone else but as a reminder for myself not to be too much caught up and drown. It’s not enough to put your future in the hands of an educational institution or even your current employer if you already working. It’s time to stop blaming the world. It’s time to take personal responsibility and to have the courage to shape your future with your own hands.</span><br />
<div style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Enuff said..</b></span></div></div><span style="font-family: verdana;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-75234485361820019702010-05-09T02:34:00.000+08:002010-05-09T02:34:19.274+08:00Mouldy dusty rusty blog, where have d owner been?<div style="color: cyan;">Its been like years months since the last time the blog was last updated or checked by the owner. Well, its not like anyone would give a damn <strike>care</strike> for the disappearance of little germs like her in d blogging world. But I guess it did raise <strike>public </strike> peer curiousity as to know the reason why d blog had turn out hideously grimy……(owwhh….mushroom were even spot to be sprouting everywhere and spider web pop- up in almost every corner….waat?...u cant see them..owh then maybe sore loser like u hv little less imagination than me…hahahaha…no offense..lol)</div><div style="color: cyan;"><br />
</div><div style="color: cyan;">As to answer all the public peers curious concern, d “missin blogger” had been summon to attend a talkshow host by the not so clever dim-witted owner of d blog which is herself….n here Im welcoming myself into the talk show…give a big applaud everyone…(spotlight trailing my figure as I walk in with much pride…haha)</div><div style="color: lime;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime;">Me : thank kiu…ten kiu…ten kiu….(waving as I sit down with grinning smile)</div><div style="color: red;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red;">Host : Its an honour to have u for tonight. Err…before we proceed can I call u retard? So dat we are</div><div style="color: red;"> more familiarized with each other.</div><br />
<div style="color: lime;">Me : Owh…sure. U can call me whatever u like coz u are me n I were u….dim witted!! Just to note, </div><div style="color: lime;"> Ive come here to clarify things so just go n shoot whatever question u feel like it. Bring it on.</div><br />
<div style="color: red;">Host : Than Ill start wif d warm up question. Did u like to brag?...coz I sense u like doing so…aren’t u?</div><div style="color: red;"> ...dats why u write d whole crap in english rite…</div><br />
<div style="color: lime;">Me : ahahaha. Come again?...did I misheard dat…lol..no..its nonononono thing…well I guess d reason</div><div style="color: lime;"> its dat my english sucks n I wanted to see to what extend I can write ….n get off with it. How much </div><div style="color: lime;"> it can improve me.. Im not good in speaking either n I figure I’ll do better writing than speaking. </div><div style="color: lime;"> Dats is why...owh…as for bm….i guess Im way to pro n familiar with it n so I don’t see need any </div><div style="color: lime;"> space of improvement for it….haha…but just so u know…I got A1 for bm for spm…hohoho…</div><div style="color: lime;"> aren’t dat great? (fake laugh with audience puking as background)</div><br />
<div style="color: red;">Host : Well I guess ur last statement prove dat my sense is right. U do like to brag. Heh.Flick2. </div><div style="color: red;"> Listen retard. I love the chit chat butu bored everyone out. Lets just cut-off to core issue as why u have been called up here?</div><div style="color: lime;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime;">Me : Bout dat. Well Im so happy dat d <strike>public</strike> peer were so concern of me. Tenk kiu , really. Well as for </div><div style="color: lime;"> the disappearance….Ive actually…kind of forget dat I own a blog coz I found a new obsession really…a nice one I can say….although it’s a bit sickening for a bored normal person average guy </div><div style="color: lime;"> out there….(chuckles disgustingly…eye rolling upwards…imagining dat particular obsession Ive </div><div style="color: lime;"> been dweelin d couple of month)….hahaha….guess wat….its very addictive…u guys should try doing</div><div style="color: lime;"> it too….this new obsession was so great dat u can have all d emotion while u r at it….u can smile…</div><div style="color: lime;"> u can laugh…u can felt sick….mad….owhh…n it kepts ur little brain busy too…into thinkin wat to </div><div style="color: lime;"> write up…how d story line would go…</div><br />
<div style="color: magenta;">Host suddenly go berserk bcoz he cant stand with my long pointless babbles n start slapping me violently with 1m/s velocity……the audience turn awwedd..</div><br />
<div style="color: red;">Host : D heck are u craping. U better lain down the whole dirt. U think u can blind me with ur wishy washy </div><div style="color: red;"> talk?...Just tell me where have u been gone? Speak!!(threatening with malice)</div><br />
<div style="color: lime;">Me : Alright2. Im sory. I have been too much absorb with www.fanfiction.net . Spent most of my time there.</div><div style="color: lime;"> Writing my own fiction n reading other people fiction. Critizing n “kutuk”- in other people writing….</div><div style="color: lime;"> yes2…its been so much fun until I forget the world of blogging…(never been a pationate one oso)…</div><div style="color: lime;"> u cant imagine how would it feel to rewrite d existing manga/anime/books/movie/comics or anythng dat</div><div style="color: lime;"> ….blalalalalalala…ooucchh….!!</div><br />
<div style="color: magenta;">Host start punching me like a punching bag mercilessly. Streams of unconsciousness slowly drift my mind and babbles away….</div><br />
<div style="color: cyan;">Begone for now!!</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-53648198216342184442010-02-05T08:16:00.000+08:002010-02-05T08:16:49.085+08:00Weekend<h3 class="GenericStory_Message" data-ft="{"type":"msg"}">Towards the end of January all the given thought of a new me failed catatstrophically</h3><h3 class="GenericStory_Message" data-ft="{"type":"msg"}"> I am tired of guessing.. De way just turn out differently.. </h3><h3 class="GenericStory_Message" data-ft="{"type":"msg"}">I need a breakway.. to rethink on everything </h3><h3 class="GenericStory_Message" data-ft="{"type":"msg"}">to the end of this weekend and a newborn me perhaps.. </h3><h3 class="GenericStory_Message" data-ft="{"type":"msg"}">i will be back.. definitely in a way to make it work!!!!!! </h3><h3 class="GenericStory_Message" data-ft="{"type":"msg"}">might as well work it out .. only me and u know it.. :P</h3>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-73638608662145673842010-01-17T02:41:00.001+08:002010-01-17T02:45:02.019+08:00Sudden guilt.......temporarily<div style="color: blue; text-align: justify;">My mum suddenly "mengigau" just an hours ago...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: justify;">since my father is not home as he went on his tabligh thing...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: justify;">I wake her up and massage her until she went back to sleep....<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: justify;">& I stay there a bit more to make sure she is okay..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: justify;">staring at her sleeping face....listening to her profound breathing..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: justify;">I trace the line and curve on her face...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: justify;">as in sleep there come to the surface all the biological traits..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">yess...indeed...the line of aging is now obvious...wrinkles and grey hair..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">my mom is getting old...she is 49 turning 50....<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">and I was reflected on her rant...which never hit me before...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">since I was away in college for this sem...she said she's always tired..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">no one to massage her...no one to hear her story and rant...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">no one to help with house chores....<br />
</div><br />
<div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">b4 I always tell her the same excuse...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">"that its time for my younger sister to learn taking part of my responsibilities..."<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">"and is not that Im not going back during weekend..." <br />
</div><br />
<div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">but I guess its not the same now...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">although my mom is now healing but the arthritis still have an effect on her..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">she cant no longer move smoothly and actively as b4..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">I see that my lazy sister is juggling with her hectic school life..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">she is changing herself....that I see and very glad of it..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">and felt sorry for not being there and help wif house chores<br />
</div><br />
<div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">still....<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">I selfishly not stay at house<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">and took all the privileged given for granted<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">I admit that Im no - smart person <br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">but denying to study is just plain stupid either<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">already in 3rd year and I'm screwed<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">never before I doubted myself so much<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">The world move and evolve clockwise<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">But my mind seem to move anti-clockwise lately<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">and maybe for the first time I fears what will come to me on future<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">there is lots of worrying to do one study is over..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">which I did not have any clues..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">for I am no fortune teller...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">even if I made a promise there is no conformation..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">I'll be able to realize it..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">what kind of horrible sinner am I...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">selfishly do things in my stupid way disregagarding the consequence..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">bluntly failed in fulfilling expectation of loved ones..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">a bad ass egoist who dont have enough courage to apologize directly<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;"> Silencely I kissed mom's forehead and hands<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">Silencely apologizing...I whispered in my heart dat....<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">however bad or in mess I might be in future..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">I'll try as hard as I might...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">as far as Im alive <br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">not to let all the wrinkles and grey hair spent worrying over me go to waste..<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">for I hope everything is not too late...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;">even if I have to render everything in my life fully for her and him...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">as mom's went into deep slumber<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">I switch off the lamp and get back to my romm<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">hoping that promise and guilt will stay fresh in my head<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">even in 10 years of time<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">as Im no more than a normal human that tend to forget things...easily<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT9e1ufZX-dxGZRFEZj5tGGJnR7Fge7SU_W4Wdk314JfrHSnjzOD5skHmuBYsUK9Gmxj4NSwRK5eNM6X_1wIbrCh3AqdT1YDHfqxUWUBWT2j4wo5eoe1mAAgywzMOlZICrFXHg5Iz5c2Ig/s1600-h/2078098933_27e5f6cb96.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT9e1ufZX-dxGZRFEZj5tGGJnR7Fge7SU_W4Wdk314JfrHSnjzOD5skHmuBYsUK9Gmxj4NSwRK5eNM6X_1wIbrCh3AqdT1YDHfqxUWUBWT2j4wo5eoe1mAAgywzMOlZICrFXHg5Iz5c2Ig/s320/2078098933_27e5f6cb96.jpg" /></a><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; color: orange; text-align: center;">I kinda understand now why a friends of mine once told that he never wished to marry as his parents is the world in which he vowed to protect and care for all his life. <br />
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</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-40397199278764561592009-12-22T13:37:00.000+08:002009-12-22T13:37:12.819+08:00A peek into a novel that I wrote back when I was in form 6..hahahaMy friends just return this one to me after all this years...haha....the storyline starts when Im in form 6 but I actually complete it back durin form 6 years....hehe....well since I was so bored I feel like to post up the prolog chapter here...hahahahaha...Among the story that I wrote before, <strike>I like this one best</strike>...huhu..no la...I actually like the title best coz it kinda warmth for me...forget it..u guys wint understand me I guess...anyway, tell me if u like it too...hehehe<br />
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><b><u><span style="font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Abadikan Semalam<o:p></o:p></span></u></b><br />
</div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><b><u><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Prolog.....<o:p></o:p></span></u></b><br />
</div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"> “ Gemok...masuk tido la. Da pukul bape nie??l!!” <br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">Laung abang bersahaja seraya menjengahkan kepalanya ke luar pintu. Dia tersengih-sengih bagaikan kerang busuk, mempamerkan barisan giginya yang putih dan kemas teratur bagaikan model iklan ubat gigi Darlie. <br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “......,” adik hanya diam tanpa membalas. Berpaling, tersenyum sekilas dan kemudian kembali merenung langit malam yang kelam. Badan gempal adik kelihatan selesa bersandar pada dinding rumah pusaka yang telah pun usang. Buku-buku sekolahnya telah pun disusun rapi dan diletakkan di sisi.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Kau dah siapkan homework?”tanya abang.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">` “Tak..ada lagi sikit.Malaslah. Esok pagi tiru la kawan.”<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Ko nie kan.Malas. Berangan je lebih”<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Hmmm, bukannya tak nak buat. Tapi sakit mata la guna lampu minyk tanah tu. Bau dia pun..eeiii,” adik bersuara membantah tanpa memalingkan kepala. <br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ PRAKK..KRIIKK,” <br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">Lantai papan pangkin yang tak beratap itu berbunyi. Menenggelamkan derapan tapak kaki abang yang kemudiannya mengambil tempat tidak berapa jauh dari adik. Abang berbaring, meletakkan kedua tangannya dibelakang kepala dan turut merenung di kejauhan. Diam. Senyap. Membisu tanpa ada suara. Suasana malam yang hening kian terasa. Nyanyian cengkerik semakin lantang dan dingin malam selepas hujan tamat terasa sehinggakan ke tulang sumsum. Sejuk.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Bang, bile agaknya rumah kita nak ada elektrik macam rumah oran lain ya..?!”<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">Adik memulakan bicara. Ada nada mengharap disitu. Membuatkan hati kecil abang terasa sayu tapi disorokkan perarasaan sedihnya itu.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Alaaaahh, kalau ada elektrik pun bukannya kau jadi rajin belajar kan? Kaukan malas tak bertempat, “seloroh abang bersahaja.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Fine. Yelah tu. Siapalah adik ni kalau nak dibandingkan dengan abang kan? Dah la tak pandai, gemok pulak tu...,”ujar adik berjauh hati.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Eh, merajuk pulak! Sejak bile ko cepat terasa ni? Hahaha. Ok,ok. Nanti bile abang dah kerja abang akan pasang elektrik. Abang nak repair rumah kita ni. Mana tahu kalau ada rezeki lebih nanti boleh buat rumah batu kan. Siap pasang air-cond lagi...”<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Cehh, dia pulak yang beranagan lebih-lebih. Umhh, rumah tu nanti lah dulu. Kita pasang elektrik. Letak paip air. Kesian kat mak. Tak payahlah mak cedok air perigi lagi. Lepas tu kan, kita hantar mak pergi haji. Takpun belikan kerusi urut Ogawa tuu...” potong adik. Wajahnya kelihatan ceria dan mata kuyunya yang telah mengantuk kembali bersinar.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Fuuhh, kalau berangan segar je kau yek. Belaja ngantuk”abang mencelah.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Nie bukan angan-angan kosong tau. Angan-angan mat jenin. Alaah, abang tu cakap je lebih. Buatnya tak. Kata orang malas, dia pon sama. Lagi teruk kot. Pergi la blaja. Awak tu exam tak lama dah. Lagi 2 bulan nak STPM dah. Kata tadi nak nak pasang letrik lah, air-cond lah, nak repair rumah lah. Kalo x study, x dapat keje baek-baek..mana nak korek duit bang,’leter adik panjang<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Isshh, ko nie kan, bising lah. Tahulah aku. Tak payah risau. Kau kena yakin dengan aku tau. See the leg aahhh”. Balas abang sedikit bongkak.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Ummhh, bang. Kalaulah kan abang dapat offer study jauh-jauh macam mana?”<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Maksud kau..? Laahh, dah semua tempat jauh kot. Mana ada universiti sebelah rumah buruk kita nie. Kena la jadi anak perantau. Tapi jangan risau abang akan pastikan abang akan selalu balik. Hujung minggu ke..hehehe.”<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Kalau setakat balik dengan tangan kosong dan nak menghabiskan beras kat rumah! Tak balik pon takpe. Haha. Eleh, kalau study oversea pon abang nak balik tiap-tiap minggu ke? “perli adik.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Uissshh, seronoknya main salji. Kalau oversea mana abang ingat nak balik dah. Hehehe”. Abang ketawa nakal. <br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “Lupa daratan betul lah.” Sentak adik.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Bukanlah, itu namanye kacang lupakan kulitkan?? Eh, kalau aku pegi oversea nanti. Ko follow la sekali. Ko study rajin-rajin. Mana la tahu rezeki kan”<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Dah la. Merepek. Aku tak pandai macam kau. Lagipon kalau kita dua pergi, sape nak jaga mak? Kasihan mak. Nanti tak ada orang tolong dia jual nasi lemak. Dah. Aku nak tidur. Tadi mak pesan. Tolong penuhkan air dalam kolah dengan baldi kat dapur tu. Dia nak pakai masak nanti. Jangan lupa tahu, ”kata adik yang telah pun bingkas bangun yang kemudiannya meluru masuk ke dalam rumah.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Eh, Mak suruh kau ke aku? Main pas- pas pulak.”<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"> “ Aku dah cari dan carik daun pisang tadi. Kau buat la yang ni.” Adik melaung dari dalam rumah. <br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 88.5pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: 20pt; line-height: 115%;">* *****************************<o:p></o:p></span><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify;">Sebelas tahun kemudian.....<br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify;"> Kepulangan ke tanah air tercinta seharusnya membawa seribu pengertian dan rasa untuk setiap insan yang telah hampir sedekad berada di perantauan. Seharusnya aku merasa teruja dan gembira untuk pulang ke rumah. Pulang untuk menatap wajah orang tersayang yang telah sekian lama berjauhan. Hampa. Hatiku sebal. Rasaku kaku. Kosong. Aku menatap jauh ke luar jendela pesawat boeing 077. <br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify;"> Melayang di awangan biru, daratan kelihatan bagaikan model permainan mini. Bumbung-bumbung rumah dan bangunan kelihatan bagaikan satu petak kecil di atas kertas. Bagaikan khayalan. Hatiku berdetak. “Rumah?!”. Bodoh sahaja bunyinya tetapi besar ertinya buatku dan betapa pentingnya peranannya buat semua insan. <br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify;"> Rumah merupakan tempat tinggal di mana sesuatu keluarga atau kumpulan tinggal dan menjalani kehidupan bersama dengan memberi komitmen antara satu sama lain. Akan begitu, Masih adakah lagi rumah untuk ku pulang? Masih adakah lagi keluarga yang menanti kepulanganku di rumah?<br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Jauh di sudut hati ku tahu rumah usang itu masih utuh di tapaknya. Menanti kepulanganku. Ya, rumah usang pusaka datuk yang didiami kami tiga beranak suatu waktu dahulu. Rumah yang menyimpan berjuta nostalgia indah zaman kanak-kanakku. Persetankan rumah itu. Rumah itu tidak lagi bererti buatku. Rumah itu telah sekian lama kosong tak berpenghuni. Tiada lagi penghuni yang menanti kepulanganku di situ<br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Walau sepahit mana pun kenyataan harus kuterima ketentuan ilahi. Allah s.w.t lebih menyayangi ibu. Semoga Allah s.w.t mencucuri rahmat ke atas arwah ibu yang telah pulang kepangkuan ilahi lapan tahun dulu. Selepas dua tahun aku meninggalkan bumi Malaysia untuk mengejar sekelumit impian di kota cinta ; Paris. Tuhan sahaja yang mengerti perasaanku ketika itu. <br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Aku ingin pulang dan hadir pada hari pengebumian ibu. Aku ingin sekali memandikan jenazah arwah ibunda yang tersayang. Mencium dahinya buat kali terakhir. Menatap wajahnya untuk yang terakhir. Biarlah aku dan adik yang mengusung jenazah ibu ke tanah perkuburan dan biarlah aku juga yang meletakkan jenazah ibu ke dalam liang lahad. Ya. Hanya Allah s.w.t sahaja yang mengerti perasaanku ketika itu. Betapa aku menyesali dan memarahi diri sendiri kerana kemiskinanku. Aku tidak mampu untuk pulang. <br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Tika itu aku merasa terlalu benci pada diri sendiri. Seorang pelajar miskin seperti aku yang tidak berdaya berbuat apa-apa untuk membantu mengurangkan kesakitan dan keperitan keluarga. Setelah pemergian ibu, adik kembali tinggal bersama ayah. Lelaki dayus pentingkan diri yang telah mengabaikan kami tiga beranak. Sejak pemergian ibu jugalah adik mula berubah laku. Surat-surat kirimanku tidak lagi berbalas. Adik terlalu marah padaku. Adik mahu aku pulang dan mengambilnya untuk tinggal bersama... jauh dari ayah. <br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Kata adik aku terlalu mementingkan diri. Kata adik dia tidak sanggup untuk tinggal bersama keluarga baru ayah. Kata adik dia tidak punya keluarga lain selain aku. Kata adik ayah tidak pernah pernah mempedulikan adik. Kata adik mak senah, isteri baru ayah terlau membencinya. Begitu juga dengan anak-anak mak senah. Kataku pada adik; maafkan abang. Abang belum boleh pulang lagi. Bersabarlah. Abang akan pulang dengan segulung ijazah. Kemudian, kata adik aku akan menyesalI perbuatanku sendiri.<br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Ya, aku sememangnya mementingkan diri. Ku lupa untuk menoleh ke belakang sedang aku pantas berlari mengejar cita- cita dan impian sendiri. Tapi cita-cita itulah harapan kita untuk keluar dari hidup yang dibelenggu kemiskinan. Impian dan cita itu jugalah alasan untukku berhenti membenci diri. Adik betul. Kini, aku sememangnya menyesali perbuatanku. <br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Setahun setelah pemergian arwah emak aku turut kehilangan satu-satunya keluarga yang masih tinggal. Adik melarikan diri dari rumah ayah dan semenjak itu tiada lagi khabar berita dari adik. Hingga kini telah tujuh tahun adik hilang tanpa jejak. Dan aku akhirnya pulang dengan segulung sijil lepasan ijazah dan segunung harapan untuk mebina kehidupan baru di hamparan dunia penuh materialistik.<span style="-moz-background-clip: border; -moz-background-inline-policy: continuous; -moz-background-origin: padding; background: yellow none repeat scroll 0% 0%;"></span> <br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Kemanakah hilangnya adik? Satu persoalan yang tak ku tahu tapi aku berjanji pada diri sendiri akan ku cari dia walau selama mana pun masa harus diambil. Walau pun biarlah hanya untuk sekali..aku tetap ingin menatap dan berbicara dengan adik.<br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">“Execuse me sir. Plese wear your sit belt. We are landing soon..”tegur seorang pramugari.<br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 35.4pt;">Lamunanku tersentak.<br />
</div><br />
Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-35224342710481294522009-12-22T13:25:00.000+08:002009-12-22T13:25:26.590+08:00: a little bit here and there :indeed ...a little bit here and there...well....d title already amplifies the content for this entry....this entry is just a babble on few topics Im gonna say or rather I have to say...since there is too much thing to talk...so what Im gonna do is just picking up just a lil bit here and there on every topics.....<br />
<div style="color: purple; text-align: center;">why????<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">simple...coz its been way too long since d last time I updated my blog...just so u noe...I can sense mushroom sprouting...Anyway, there is too much thing I wanna put up here but then to sheer laziness...so I just ignore it..<br />
<br />
<div style="color: red;"><b>Little bit here & there 1---> Holiday</b><br />
</div></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Since holiday started..I had been seriuosly abominably lazy....<b> </b>sighhh.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I cant really count the reason why but maybe I've become to attach wif my lappy & internet..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Well in d past I hardy sit idly during long holiday such as this, always making sure there is a project to work on...either by working part time...adopting new project to work on...writing..drawing...crafting.. etc etc..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">But for this particular holiday..I felt like I had done nothing worth for affection<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">yes...I went for fieldtrip but other than that I kept doing worthless thing like reading d same manga again and again for countless of time in a day....<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">No wonder my mum kept scolding me days & nite...not to mention d noticably increase in physical size & weight....so I guess I might have to go into diet soon..or actually have been force by certain someone..hehe<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><span style="color: red;">Little bit here & there 2----> fieldwork</span><br />
</b><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">As usual field trip is synonym to d life of a final year geology student...so this time I went over to Melaka...masjid tanah that is..and from that all I can say is that resistivty fieldwork is such a bother..there is lot of work to be done and the equipment is heavy...so a great teamwork is essentially needed..<br />
haha...Im not playing d good role to begin with so I think Syap and the rest of the team (arda, nur n yazid) have to work harder....sorry guys...nonetheless...it was fun...playing around d beaches..strolling d shops in melaka parade....eating ikan bakar....vexing arda while watching new moon....d first experiance taking express bus back to kl...playing with parut kelapa...walking in undurably stench swarm...founding an abandon lake...not to mention d spooky things dat happen in one of d site...<br />
I spent 5 days in melaka...come back to kl for a day and went off again to pahang...this trip was joined by nur, arda, ara and lead by Dr. Sam....cant really say much bout it except we've been on road for two days..so Im quite amazed that Dr. Sam can realy drive for such long hours...Pahang trip are more to site viewing so there isnt much fooling around...it just that sometimes he likes to ask awkward & funny question...<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"> <span style="color: purple;">What did u think about Dr. Is?</span><br />
</div><div style="color: purple; text-align: center;">What is interesting about Dr. Is?<br />
</div><div style="color: purple; text-align: center;">Overall, did the trip is good or not?<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">In which I answered oddly for each one of the question. But really during this trip I realized that the scenery in Malaysia is heaven even its just an oil plam platation that greet me along the way...so it kept me thinking..how come not many of us aware of this...maybe becoz there is not much effort to publicize our own treasure..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"> An unforgettable experience indeed<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Before I forgot, Dr Sam endless nags is something shud'nt be forgotten...some of it was hard..but I don really mind coz he sounds exactly like my mother...so I can help laughing at the end of his scolding...but not directly after...hehe...nway he's been so nice to us...even let us stay at his house for a nite & treating us to dinner and lunch.....so I would like to extand my thanks to all of d people involve especeially him. <br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><span style="color: red;">Little bit here & there 3----> results</span><br />
</b><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Results were out and mine was sucks so I have lots of worrying to do...but oh well..lets just save that when the new semester started...shall we??..In short, I can only say that I need that 3 above cgp for next sem..wooohool....die lorrr...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: left;"><b>Little bit here & there 4</b>-----> <b>Suicide</b><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Someone in d neighborhood commit suicide by hanging himself...<b> </b>its kinda sad...even if I dunno him I cant help thinking that maybe in d past we had walked past each other..and now while he is dead and Im very much alive....wat can be so painful to bear?...well..honestly I cant understand wat can be solve by this stupidly selfish act??<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Suicide is a permanent solution for temporary problem...once u die everything ends...leaving only sorrow for those who remain..hurm...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><span style="color: red;">Little bit here and there 5---> all the little things</span><br />
</b><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> <br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">My dear devil Angora went missing and every search effort turn futile.. <br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">UPSR is out and my sister scor 4A1B..not bad for her..congrats..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">My mum used every opportunity she had to nags me and I for a split second I wish new sem start asap<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Other than that there is nothing much except outing, lepaking and catching up wif frens<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Btw...I went watching Avatar 3D after returning from fieldwork and it's not worth it for 18 ringgit coz the 3D effect was'nt that captivating....haisshh...wasted!!<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I started listening to radio...and plish dont be shocked by i tunes in to ERA station...hahaha...coz arda and nur t were stunned when I read<span style="color: red;"> "malay cintan-cintun novel" </span>in front of them...I actually read them...FYI!!<br />
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</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-18088304183677973342009-10-12T02:43:00.002+08:002009-10-12T02:58:54.268+08:00-a never ending expectation-<div style="color: lime; text-align: justify;">While she was doing her Science & Technology assignment..somehow her mind travels and reflects back like a broken old television with black and white image...it goes way back to the mundane evening she spent watching an episode of Doraemon..that one episode which almost bring tears down her round fluffy cheeks..=)<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: justify;">Yes...she did cried and tried to hide her tears but its not because she had been bewitch by Doraemon..<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: justify;">well...wat can one expect from a round head robot that have everything besides fun..<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: justify;">What really makes her cries is the hidden message brought about on expectation...parental expectation to be exact...<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: justify;">Yeaahh...very true that uncertainity and expectation were the joy of life...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="color: lime;">Every single soul..human ..mammals can't ever run from reckoning..putting that hope high up on others</span>...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="color: orange; text-align: justify;">Literally we were made through the love of our parents and ever since the day we are born, we have been treated as an object beyond preciousness. As we grow from an incomprehensible infant to a wandering toddler, we abide ourselves to our parents and became dependent towards them. ...<br />
</div><div style="color: orange; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="color: orange; text-align: justify;">It then became an obligation for us to respect them and obey them. Parents generally have an expectation for us to achieve to be “successful” in their own various definitions. The predicament that always occurs is that we failed to be on that spotlight...sadly..but truly..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Typically lot of teenagers buckle to the pressure and just give up. Any form of emotion that in some way resembles enthusiasm is thrown out the window...<span style="color: blue;">(thats what I do ...I guess..hehe.)..</span><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Either u face them or runaway from them..in my case I flight everytime I caught the opputunity..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Somehow ..I just cant stop feeling guilty remembring my sin..hehehe...<br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: justify;">(my poor parents..forgive ur lousy daughter ya...)<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">yes..regrets will lingers but for now I wanna be true to myself....<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: justify;">Still expectation wont stop...even u urself would put some sort of expectation oh ur own capabilities..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="color: purple;">Even in writing this article i feel like it’s not as good as it could be, what will people think of it? Of me? Will they laugh? Will they understand what i am going on about? Will they love me forever or will they stop reading my blog altogether?</span><br />
<br />
And now, after leaving the childhood and upon entering adulthood, have my expectations been fulfilled?<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Of course not! There’s more than ever now.<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Expectation to grad in nearest time, getting a well paid job, nurturing my other abilities and talents, be more useful towards my family...And that’s about where it ends, because by the time i have fulfilled all these expectations, i’ll be an old woman in a wheelchair contemplating what my life would have been like if i had done things differently. Not buckled by the expectations that myself and others placed upon me. Etcetera etcetera. But that would also be a load of shit coz expectations are apart of day to day life.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: justify;">I guess it’s learning to except them and embrace or ignore them as they come which is what makes us truly content with our life.<br />
<br />
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</div><div style="color: red; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: justify;">A life full of regrets is epic fail. U can beat me on that.... <br />
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</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-1573459284066962882009-10-08T11:09:00.000+08:002009-10-08T11:09:34.718+08:00Stepping into life...<div style="text-align: center;">People say walking is as simple as putting one foot in front of the other.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Its really a bit more conplicated than that...really<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">It requires falling, catching urself, & pushing urself up again all at the same time.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">A bit like life really.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">In fact it is something that you alone must do for urself.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Even if the road is not clear<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Stepping ahead is a must so that one day u'll find ur own place<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Where is that place..?<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Dun ask me...I dont even noe..but thats ok<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Coz I noe I'll be ok & Im ready to take my step<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Even if the light goes off<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">I'll just walk first & try to figure it out later<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">~~another crap jotted down in 5 minutes time at 11.05 am b4 sed chem..haha.class time..lets walk.~<br />
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</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-2600584918114751042009-10-03T22:39:00.001+08:002009-10-03T23:53:20.539+08:00Scratching out words in sullen state......In the way to an XXXX place I'm kind of not in da mood for certain reason...<span style="color: blue;">(mostly coz I dun wish to be there but somewhere else)...</span><br />
So trying to justified with my own feeling I kept quiet most of the time & just stare forlornly out of window <span style="color: blue;">(I wish that no one notice this and acted just fine)...</span><br />
everything is moving and my mind just can't rest..<br />
as I found a piece of paper I start to scratch up some sketch & then some words..<br />
Out of nowhere..<br />
words just flows out & I ended up scratching up some poems which seem ok-ok for me..hehe<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">This is it.....<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">mommy can i go outside and play?<br />
birds are singing in such lovely day<br />
and i can't wait until my broken wings are cured<br />
oh for one bright moment in the sun<br />
every bird must wing and sing its song<br />
once twice again and then it's gone<br />
<br />
mommy it was such a lovely day<br />
the birds were singing then it slipped away<br />
the birds were singing then they <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">flew</span> away<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">leaving me alone they flies away<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">my dear it was such a lovely day<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">beware my child it wont stay that way<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">thunder might struck as skies turns grey<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;">patient my love and you'll be pay<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">mommy its still a lovely day<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">tho thunders and storms were on their way<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">cause I remembered what you always say<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">that rainbow will lurks at the first gleams of light after a rainy day<br />
</div><div style="color: red; text-align: center;">believing in them I soothed myself in taking the rocky pathway<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: purple; text-align: center;">cause I know you' be watching - always<br />
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</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-56871463823204412602009-09-28T00:22:00.001+08:002009-09-28T00:24:39.982+08:00A trust misplaced...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqOp6kbEzh9g_IBigu0iJiTlbhhWXVa5ir0ORyRooC9sNFDaNpc4hhsP2ak7mmm6gl4JRGDqFy288azIBFhBnPdEXzWVj8BgL_4ESt7UnblnTzTzM0Cs_tkYSOh0gfXTOqyRhUPxwjlXlq/s1600-h/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqOp6kbEzh9g_IBigu0iJiTlbhhWXVa5ir0ORyRooC9sNFDaNpc4hhsP2ak7mmm6gl4JRGDqFy288azIBFhBnPdEXzWVj8BgL_4ESt7UnblnTzTzM0Cs_tkYSOh0gfXTOqyRhUPxwjlXlq/s400/images.jpg" /></a><br />
</div>Many times in my life have i ended up wrongly trusting people which in one or two incident have caused more than just the feeling of trust being betrayed. <span style="color: blue; font-style: italic;">(Maybe its just one of my many failings, i'm only human/devil rite?)</span> The world taught me that trusting only oneself is the safest way, however if i do open up, i place my trust entirely on that person. This is because, i believe that deep down, everyone is a good and trust worthy person. Thus, if i show a certain level of trust to someone, i expect to be be returned with the same level of trust.<br />
<br />
Most of the time, my trust is well placed. However, in this case, i made the same mistake again. <span style="background-color: purple;"></span><span style="background-color: magenta; font-style: italic;">(will i never learn? Arghh!!!)</span>. Surely, it needs a certain amount of time for me to admit it as this time, it was with one of my best friend XX. This person is one of my earliest best friends which I treasured the most. We have a very long story with each other and most of it is a sad one <span style="color: blue;">(all the mishap exp by her n me by dat time)</span>. We had never quarrel, I guess its because she is too dignfied and I'm being too soft. Even if a hundred years had gone by without any contact she will stay close at my heart as one of my loved one.<br />
<br />
I noe that distance and both our hectic lifestyle seperate us but still did'nt we make a promise to contact and see each other on regular basis?..and I still hold the promise strong to myself..and I expect her to do so<br />
<br />
The few three years of separation we kept updating each other on regular basis..<br />
As time past by, one phone call in several months were so hard to get..<br />
So everytime I'll be the one calling..seeing her at her place...getting her to went out..<br />
And each effort I took make me sounds like an idiot...<br />
But still I tried to tolerate and sugar coat my sour feeling that start to develop..<br />
Ive guess Im just tired of waiting..<br />
So this raya I go as far as ignoring her 3 time phone call..(usually it will be me callin)<br />
Still I felt so terribly in guilt and after several days I tried to get her on the line so many times..<br />
....sadly...she didnt pick up....too busy to notice my call I guess..<br />
I dont blame her tho....nevermind...there is still next time...(biting the dissapoinment..haiisshh(-_-)!!)<br />
<br />
<div style="color: lime;">So what I really learn is..we dont always get back what we harvest..<br />
</div><div style="color: lime;">In this place..the trust..<br />
</div><div style="color: lime;">Nevermind tho...maybe this is wat I got for broken the promise I make with others..<br />
</div><div style="color: lime;">As a human I do break promise ...in fact..a lot of promises...<br />
</div><br />
Like today.....I was campaigning on my loads of assignment..<br />
So I excused myself & did'nt do the cleaning after people went back (raye visit)<br />
Instead of cleaning up.<span style="color: red;">.</span><strike style="color: red;">I go and do the assignment</strike><span style="color: red;">.</span>...ahaha..no la...I was playing game at my room<br />
So when I see my father cleaning up <span style="color: blue;">(the kitchen & dining room were spotless..hehe)</span><br />
I felt so horrible & promise myself to complete my assignment by today to be more available for my family..<br />
<br />
<div style="color: blue;">( my father should'nt put his blind faith on me...he shud hv noe my character but still spare me...Lurve him very2 much...one of the best father one can have.... (^.^)>..heheehe)<br />
</div>Still...I havent start a word on it yet..<br />
See...once again the trust both my father and me myself had put on myself had been misplaced...<br />
.<span style="color: blue;">(if u undersand wat Im trying to say la...hahaha) </span><br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="color: red;">Huhuhu...I guess I should stop now...<br />
</div><div style="color: red;">Need to get back on my assignment which had not made any progress frm yesterday.,<br />
</div><div style="color: red;">Shoot me pliss.....<br />
</div><br />
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</a>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-1466718844114645632009-09-27T21:39:00.000+08:002009-09-27T21:39:35.222+08:00Waiting<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhRrXKkit4tKDjHLopwihL93JocbCHq59A5_DIsrdb5oKrjTnroumjWWdO9ej9L1Nb7rxqoefT5erhvbaHtrG-4D0ierKcdNRSmOFJJ6UIqRjXP0ZPmMWCV13lffhC-afWPnqZdUkX4gtp/s1600-h/Tired+of+phone.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br />
</a> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAfQpYf4x20nfhjecAxSsaafcJLSiy76VxI5kh9Wyw25rtRRMqOZO8KMn74Bz5Oe2p6WBfGhzit-994DE1WnEFW5YN_XzaZhwELmotEkaQNdTK9TdfTKO89reqrqb65dgczG0kdIDpwSOs/s1600-h/Fig_12___Waiting_by_the_Phone.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAfQpYf4x20nfhjecAxSsaafcJLSiy76VxI5kh9Wyw25rtRRMqOZO8KMn74Bz5Oe2p6WBfGhzit-994DE1WnEFW5YN_XzaZhwELmotEkaQNdTK9TdfTKO89reqrqb65dgczG0kdIDpwSOs/s320/Fig_12___Waiting_by_the_Phone.png" /></a><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 130%;"><span style="font-style: italic;"> Silent</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">Waiting for the phone to ring</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">But maybe someone’s on the other end</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">Just waiting for you to call them</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">You say I’ll wait just one more minute</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">But the phone it just won’t ring</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">And your thoughts return to the question</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">Is someone on the other end?</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">Do they want to talk to you today,</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">Are they waiting?</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">But the phone it just won’t ring</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">So you say I’ll wait just one more minute</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">But the anxiety runs way too deep</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">So you walk away for today</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">I guess they didn’t want to call you</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">But I know better</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">I know there’s someone on the other end</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">Waiting for you to call them</span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">But instead the phone rings somewhere else</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">“Yes, that’s right I don’t have any plans.”</span></span><br />
</div><br />
<span style="color: #33ccff;">I sit here now waiting for a call that might never come. </span><br />
<span style="color: #33ccff;">Maybe Im just lying to myself and its all just in my head.</span><br />
<span style="color: #33ccff;">Wasn't there a promise we would contact each other?</span><br />
<span style="color: #33ccff;">Being a realistic person i should know better that romance is dead in the world right?</span><br />
<span style="color: #33ccff;">Yet i'm a hopeless romantic who rather wait than make the first call.</span><br />
<span style="color: #33ccff;">Oh well, back to busying myself....</span><br />
<br />
Waiting for phone calls sucks...<br />
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</div>Might as well b the one to call rather than ended up death...<br />
but still I wanted to wait more...<br />
*sigh*... <br />
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</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-4310686540789655172009-09-24T13:46:00.000+08:002009-09-24T13:46:47.776+08:00Facts...that I can't deny & the thought that relief me....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-XeUC6MddEGiA07KjMAmyx5xMb5bnWvjY-xA7fElXs1ZoAacNXMojqXSXTP6EiHqdO4x93Ol81Tvb3vIv0qaki7jqQS8apfD4z648nrbtvVcdNsb7NUQl45lPVIyD9MoowtSQwuFFpEKS/s1600-h/weirdo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-XeUC6MddEGiA07KjMAmyx5xMb5bnWvjY-xA7fElXs1ZoAacNXMojqXSXTP6EiHqdO4x93Ol81Tvb3vIv0qaki7jqQS8apfD4z648nrbtvVcdNsb7NUQl45lPVIyD9MoowtSQwuFFpEKS/s400/weirdo.jpg" /></a><br />
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Yes..surely..undoubtly...definitely..convincingly...absolutely<br />
I had no problem in admitting that I'm <span style="color: red;">weird</span>..(<span style="color: blue;">as people used to told me</span>)<br />
tho I'm not sure on what basis they judge me.....<br />
<br />
<br />
but for myself I dont think there r any difference in my appearance..except that I'm pretty plump..huhu<br />
maybe it's in the act..(#*_*#)<br />
I really like to do weird stuff & not to mention having weird thought..<br />
(<span style="color: blue;">Im not pervert tho...haha</span>)...its just plain that I hate to do something out of the norm<br />
so if that include me into the weirdo group...<br />
just be it...<br />
<br />
<br />
really... I found that it amuse them to use it as an issues to tease me<br />
yepp..I dont mind but... pretty much .... but if u keep being tease again & again....<br />
its kinda vexing.... & normally I'll start puting up fuss...<br />
either Il'l counter back mildly or just keep quiet & leave..<br />
its fight or flight u see...(^.^) >...(<span style="color: blue;">rooaarr..Im living the savage life..haaha</span>)<br />
actually it does'nt even worth to start a fight with<br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="color: magenta;">so most of the time I let them amuse themselves more...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;">-inner thought :</span> <span style="color: lime;">watever guys...keep it coming...be my guess..entertain urself coz I dont give a damn.</span><br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;"> haha....you laugh b'coz I'm different, I laugh b'coz you're all the same..its fair<br />
</div><div style="color: lime; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Whoever say that the world was unfair....yeaa..it did la in some sort...huhu<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">But surely all this people who like to tease would never know that as they amuse themselves teasing others ..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">me too... took the pleasure amusing myself laughing on their typical self...sometimes<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">ain't that fair enough...<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">but of coz I don't let them noe bout it...coz it wont be fun anymore after that..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I don't see any wrong in being difference..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">& honestly I really did laugh when I see that everyone is the same<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">if you look at the world a& all the people from a different perspective..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">its kinda of humorous but not in hilarious way ..maybe..ahahaha<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Ok..now ..I did think my word mark that Im really am weird..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">hahahah..no longer noe wat Im saying.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: red;">still beyond any shadow of doubt I firmly thought that... </span><br style="color: red;" /><span class="UIStory_Message"><span style="color: red;">U laugh bcoz I'm different, I laugh bcoz u're all the same..</span><span style="color: purple;">(^_^)v</span></span></span><br />
</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-40775272427721891682009-09-21T01:54:00.002+08:002009-09-21T13:55:22.776+08:00The day I turn 22.......on 2nd Hari Raya....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhupZInZ3QNGXREmE_KlKQBtP4VRID-1kkTQwVFoqN_U4sMWPzGNMuSJt9RugAh35hpwkkBubNeT1Z7r4wiOkA9aziEA-bTIMM-hap9BLrOOdAGPopTj0CKODB9JXpFh1hIDfr4LxBW57D3/s1600-h/happy-birthday.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhupZInZ3QNGXREmE_KlKQBtP4VRID-1kkTQwVFoqN_U4sMWPzGNMuSJt9RugAh35hpwkkBubNeT1Z7r4wiOkA9aziEA-bTIMM-hap9BLrOOdAGPopTj0CKODB9JXpFh1hIDfr4LxBW57D3/s320/happy-birthday.gif" /></a><br />
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<div style="color: red;">On the 21st September 2009, I had to remove the "<span style="font-weight: bold;">1</span>" digit and replace it with "<span style="font-weight: bold;">2</span>" from the back of my age description in applications form..<br />
</div><div style="color: red;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red;"><br />
</div>I'm definitely in a hate love mood when it comes to my age...<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">I love the fact that i'm maturing gracefully <span style="color: blue; font-style: italic;">(i sound like i'm 50 plus)</span> and is anticipating for the next one to come...<span style="color: blue; font-style: italic;">(at 22 I'm old enough to legally go clubbing! Yeah!!...but pity I didnt do clubbing..haha)</span><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="color: black; text-align: right;"><span style="background-color: #38761d;"></span><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">But i hate the fact that as i get older, people always expects me to act a certain way...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: orange;">e.g: </span><span style="color: lime; font-style: italic;">"ehh? How old are you now? Still play with the younger children ?"</span><br />
<span style="color: lime; font-style: italic;"> "oii! Big baby! don't keep playing be more serious...."</span><br />
<span style="color: lime; font-style: italic;"> "Are you suppose to act like this with them at this age?</span><span style="color: lime;">"</span><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: black; text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: blue; font-weight: bold;">(-_-!!!)</span><span style="color: blue;"> </span>Get what i mean? Just because i'm past the ten-ish age I'm suppose to act like a middle age man? sigh.... The family is so traditional... but they are family. <span style="color: blue; font-style: italic;">(What to do?)</span><br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-style: italic;"></span>The family isn't really big on the B'Day thing once u reach the age 10. To them, the day of your birth is just another day or if they want to celebrate it they will throw a big eat out and inform everyone weeks before the actually date.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">In my family wishing each other B'day will sparks awkwardness....haha <br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Even my mum also had an awkward moment wishing me on my B'day, she went like, <span style="color: #bf9000;">" Oh!*with a look of surprise* Almost forgot to wish you Happy Birthday..."</span> <span style="color: blue; font-style: italic;">(lame right? but at least she put effort in it and tried)</span><span style="color: blue;">.</span><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">So almost like any other year..my B'day was once again forgotten..haha..realy..but I dont mind..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Normally the occasion would be I'm the one buying the cake & my family will ask whose B'day was it?<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">...A little dissapointed i answered,<span style="color: #bf9000;">"err.. mine?".</span> They looked at me with that looked as if they just saw superman flew past and scolded me somemore, <span style="color: #bf9000;">"Eh! why never tell me earlier? I didn't know la"</span>.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="color: blue;">(Didn't remember still scold me </span><span style="color: blue; font-weight: bold;">T-T</span><span style="color: blue;">)</span></span><span style="color: blue;"> </span><br />
</div><div style="color: blue; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">The one's that actually remembered made me even more disappointed...<br />
</div><div style="color: #bf9000; text-align: left;">"See at least *Nisfu (younger sister) who remembered* know when is my birthday..."<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">She replied, <span style="color: #bf9000;">"actually I also forgotten one, just saw in ur friendster screen at the last minute". </span><span style="font-style: italic;"> </span><br />
</div><div style="color: #e06666; text-align: left;"><span style="font-style: italic;">*A dagger stab me in the heart*</span><br />
<br />
</div><div style="color: #e06666; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">But still I had few good memory on my B'day celebration like the one when a bunch of friends try to assemble 12 pieces of cakes into one cakes in Secret Recipe's, ambushing me at my house when I skip school on my Bday & that time when my family & an uncle neighbour arrange surprise party at the Taa'bas Village (Middle east restaurant) that nearly make me faint with embarrassment as the waitress came in singing & holding the cake.<br />
</div><div style="color: #e06666; text-align: left;">* I dun like to be centre of attention..u see..hehe..<span style="color: blue;">(myself being an anti-social old hag (0.o)..)</span><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">also all the beautiful memories of B'day party from when I was small..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">& simply all the wonderful memories through thick & thin since the day my mom brought me into this world..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I don't care if people forget bout my B'day as long they hold my existence close to their hearts..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">for I meant to be something to them ( dear one ) as they had been to me<br />
</div><div style="color: #e06666; text-align: left;">*ceh....blushing (^.^)/ ...getting bashful..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Owwhh...like all the people who forgot my B'day which had been overshadow by Hari Raya..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I also almost forgot to wish everyone hepi hari raye..<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">maap zahir batin..atas segala kesalahan, makan n minum, n sume ter2 tuh...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">kita buka buku baru eh..0-0...<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b style="color: red;">Another year older & hope to be more wiser..</b><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b style="color: red;">In forgiving and forgetting...(which I always do)..huhu<br />
</b><br />
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</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-54459454961340346602009-09-18T21:10:00.000+08:002009-09-18T21:10:36.841+08:00Not to worry..its just another coccon phase b4 one can fly high..huhu!!<div style="color: magenta;">Sms..<br />
</div><div style="color: magenta;"><br />
</div>Heyy..stubborn girl!! I dont like it when u r putting on dat kind of face. Do tell me if you got problem.<br />
Dont pretend u r happy and such..u r only eating urself...& I wont allow that..I noe u always act high<br />
& mighty although u r crumbling down inside..it's no use forcing you to talk..sighh..but if u ever need<br />
sum1 do reach me ASAP ..luv ya<br />
<br />
<div style="color: magenta;">Conversation...<br />
</div><br />
Diba..kenape ko macam lain je lately...?!!..Mmg la dasarnye sama tp pelik la..pokoknyer ko mmg pelik<br />
dr biase...double extra ordinary pelik...<br />
<br />
<div style="color: magenta;">Ym....<br />
</div><br />
Dear!! Are u ok? Whats up with all that weird shout out?! Wanna tell me something? Come on..cry it<br />
out & let me be ur comfort even if u refuse to say a word..<br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="color: red;">Hahaha..am I that different? How can they tell? Well, I have been receiving this kind of treatment lately.<br />
</div><div style="color: red;">Pliss...pliss...dont worry over me..Im doing fine..really.. (^o^)v...However, I really appreciate all d support<br />
</div><div style="color: red;">ok?!!...I think if all d support I receive came in term of money..I'll be rich by now..hehehe<br />
</div><div style="color: red;">Thanks a million lot & just let me be...I 'll make it my own way no matter how hard things could get...<br />
</div><br />
<br />
<span style="color: magenta;">This is a tribute to all my friend ;</span><br />
<br />
"A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared; he sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole.Then it seemed to stop making any progress.It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no further.<br />
<br />
Then the man decided to help the butterfly, so he took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shrivelled wings.<br />
<br />
The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support, which would contract in time.<br />
<br />
Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with swollen body and shrivelled wings.<br />
<br />
<strong>It never was able to fly.</strong><br />
<br />
What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand that the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were the nature's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon."<br />
<br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: red;">Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life.If nature allowed us to go through our life without any obstacles, it would cripple us.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: red;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: red;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: red;">We would not be as strong as what we could have been.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: red;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: red;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: red;">You have stumbled and fall before.Now its time to fly.</span><br style="background-color: lime; color: red;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: red;">With beautiful and charming wings, that's what you are.</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSEnabkpZ5gO6WJt4nUlcB1ahUidqYipwuaww82omrtGzV1nk0rUaEX5lzCmCD3gxMTTZpCSrId83QA8lybuTzD_NnpCRDpowaWUVP9FgxBLBj4McN2Dkpg7janpzlaitr9Zs1lIKuFq_D/s1600-h/transparent-butterfly2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSEnabkpZ5gO6WJt4nUlcB1ahUidqYipwuaww82omrtGzV1nk0rUaEX5lzCmCD3gxMTTZpCSrId83QA8lybuTzD_NnpCRDpowaWUVP9FgxBLBj4McN2Dkpg7janpzlaitr9Zs1lIKuFq_D/s320/transparent-butterfly2.jpg" /></a><br />
</div><span style="background-color: white; color: red;"> </span><br style="background-color: white; color: red;" /><br />
<strong style="color: lime;">Fly high, fly with style.</strong><br style="color: lime;" /><span style="color: lime;">Be a butterfly roaming the sky.</span><br style="color: lime;" /><span style="color: lime;"> </span>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-15122295631399424502009-09-18T14:11:00.001+08:002009-09-18T14:12:04.808+08:00My blog is mouldy..<span style="color: orange;">I can see mushroom sprouting.....</span>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-47219654027104842502009-09-14T02:16:00.005+08:002009-09-14T04:34:04.023+08:00Hellish weekend....but a fruitful one....in the end<div style="color: blue;">It seems like ages since the last time I put up a post..</div><div style="color: blue;">Reason being...Im pretty tight up lately..very..</div><div style="color: blue;">..might as well choke myself off..</div><div style="color: blue;">Huhuhu...and now Im back again..</div><div style="color: blue;">*applaud*<br />
<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;"></div><div style="color: blue;">Its been a hellish weekend for me..</div><div style="color: blue;">in fact it's been a hellish month </div><div style="color: blue;">...that Ive gone throuh...<br />
<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;"></div><div style="color: blue;">...yeahh...</div><div style="color: blue;">things were very rough around me..</div><div style="color: blue;">&so is so..I go through just fine..<br />
<br />
<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">...you noe...</div><div style="color: blue;">I'm used to stand up firm... </div><div style="color: blue;">even at the limit of breaking down..</div><div style="color: blue;">that might be the most proper thing bout me..</div><div style="color: blue;"></div><div style="color: blue;">but still this weekend..it become fruitful<br />
<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;">although very tiring..</div><div style="color: blue;">still at the end everyone was happy..</div><div style="color: blue;">that's what matter to me..<br />
<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;"></div><div style="color: blue;">Im talking about kueh raya preparation here..</div><div style="color: blue;">that had much more significant meaning behind it..</div><div style="color: blue;">as for me if not for you..<br />
<br />
</div><div style="color: blue;"></div><div style="color: blue;">Tart nenas is not just a simple tart..</div><div style="color: blue;">Sweet & sour just like the taste of life..</div><div style="color: blue;">Biskut sampan might be colourful..</div><div style="color: blue;">as such the colour of life..</div><div style="color: #6fa8dc;">It's <span style="color: black;">black</span>, it's <span style="color: lime;">green</span>, it's <span style="color: red;">red</span> n <span style="color: yellow;">yellow</span>..</div><div style="color: blue;">Kuih siput n kacang goreng..</div><div style="color: blue;">although looks <span style="color: #783f04;">brown</span>,simple n crunchy..</div><div style="color: blue;">who knows how hard can the preparation be..</div><div style="color: blue;">believe me..</div><div style="color: blue;">(I've got blister on one of my finger sbb kupas kacang)</div>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-72572159269066945492009-06-24T23:16:00.002+08:002009-06-24T23:36:37.162+08:00Crazziness..urgently need professional help!!<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">I’m so not in the mood today. I don’t know what’s wrong but the day starts off beautifully… at least..I think so. Nice weather, waking up early, delicious breakfast, roll back into bed, wake up late in the afternoon, take bath, watch tv, streaming the internet <span style=""> </span>without any particular motif. Its been the same routine for almost 3 weeks, well of course in between that I have my day out.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">I guess I’m just bored and my semester break plan ended up in total mess. Lucky, the semester break had almost end. I’m gonna drive myself crazy if my life continue like this. Well, I can’t blame anyone either and it looks like somehow it is my fault. I quit my job just for the sake that I’m not happy with it. Well, they may call I’m stupid but somehow I don’t see any wrong in that. It’s me whose been working out my butt!! So I have every right to decide on what to do…whether to go forward or pulling it off. Why did you want to keep on working on something that turn you miserable? Sigh….why did everyone keep getting in my way……<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">I wanna take on other job after resigning but then say hi to another setback. <span style=""> </span>I can’t or may I say I’m being indirectly force not to take other job… and so that’s why I’m spending my semester break like an old hag.<span style=""> </span>This drawback kinda life had finally taking a toll on me. Gosh…what’s wrong with me?<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">I guess I’m not just bored but I’m frustrated as well. But, of what?<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">Frustration do not lingered only just for one time insignificant annoyance. Inversely it is being drag and build up through all the accumulated miff you had experience all your life.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">It might sound like repentance but it doesn’t mean that I’m regretting my life. No, I had a good life.<span style=""> </span>It’s just that I had a few regrets. Sometimes I can’t help pondering how things can be now if<span style=""> </span>I’ve done everything my way, my wish. Why did I have to satisfy everyone? Why did I always held back?<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">I guess now it’s not just cause by boredom , and not just frustrated either but I’m sick of listening to others. I’m sick of hearing the word..don’t do that, do this instead….no, that’s wrong ..u should be..or whatever it is. Soon, after taking up this advice from this self-proclaim<span style=""> </span>altruists we gonna realize that what we had expect at the age o 19 might not turn out the way they claim it should be when we reached 29. Only then you realize that you already stuck in this <span style=""> </span>sticky situation. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">What is there about this altruism thing..? Am I turning out to be one? Hope not. <span style=""> </span>Gosh…and I guess they won’t tell the same thing if it’s their life which is at stake. And now when I’m almost entangled by listening to them and I wonder how on earth would they react if they know? Applauding? The words still ring freshly and now I can hear the applaud loudly…<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">Shoot me…my <span style=""> </span>ears hurting…can’t stand the sound anymore….<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">I’m getting crazier day by day…atypical depression...juz dun ask why..??!! The symptom is there - excessive mood positivity, weight gain, increased in appetite, hypersomnia, sensation of heaviness in limbs (lazy)...haha..juz waiting for social impairment to occur..sigh......<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US">Need to lead more purposeful life in future than maybe I’ll be happier…<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="" lang="EN-US"><span style=""> </span><o:p></o:p></span></p>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-10758236343748539712009-04-25T17:48:00.003+08:002009-05-03T22:07:56.361+08:00Bab* or khinzir...heck..what's the different??!!<p class="MsoNormal">I think this kind of topic are rather off for discussion but ; <span style=""> </span>still <span style=""> </span>I was call to share with u lots..</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Alrighty, the stories goes like this ....on last weekend two of my little brother and sister are qurreling..</p> <p class="MsoNormal">It seem that I kind of cant remember what about it...</p> <p class="MsoNormal">U noe ...the tipycal things...</p> <p class="MsoNormal">they started to scream out like maniacs....blaming, scratching, kicking <span style=""> </span>and hitting each other..</p> <p class="MsoNormal">So like a good older and wiser sister I draw them apart and scold.... (well what I actually did is just asking out from quite a distance..hehe..not really a good sister )</p> <p class="MsoNormal">“Ok.ok...whats <span style=""> </span>going on? Stop it guys. <span style=""> </span>Who start<span style=""> </span>first?” I asked</p> <p class="MsoNormal">“Gemok tu yang mula dulu.Ko try la cari pasal lagi dengan aku,” shout one of them. Smirking. Winning the fight.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">“Bodoh. Ko la yang gemok. Dah la takde leher . KHINZIR!!,” snap one loudly and emotionally with tears <span style=""> </span>flowing down her cheeck. Guess<span style=""> </span>the naughty boy beat her down. Hehe...</p> <p class="MsoNormal">P/S : Mind you. They had just have been hoal over the coals for using the words babi the day before..Tak serik-serik jugak ..adooii!!</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Well at this last word of KHINZIR I cant help but laughing out hilariously...</p> <p class="MsoNormal">My thought went like...;” Wow..sopannyer!! What the heck?! It does’nt matter <span style=""> </span>whether its <span style=""> </span>b*bi or khinzir.<span style=""> </span>Come on !!”</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=""> </span>A curse is still a curse no matter how you twist the word. It is your intention,the situation that cause you to use it and the way you pronounce it that make a word turn into a curse.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Still, I cant help but feel a little overwhelm by both little brat. Huhu..leaving me with awe because I<span style=""> </span>cant really use that kind of word no matter how angry I can be. The far I could go is normally bodoh and I cant help saying it with a little bit of guilt.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Far worst than bodoh.. I might use bengong or bangang. And very rarely or occasionally I said the word f*ck out of mischief but never with rage.Huhu..</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I dont really know how to curse out of respect to my parents and there is <span style=""> </span>another bit of reasoning beside that but naturally I just hate harsh words!! So..how in the world that the two little brat with the same upbringing as me can curse much better than me....?! Weird la..huhu..</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-42779683257282891292009-04-01T02:29:00.004+08:002009-05-03T23:37:31.017+08:00Value of money..!!??<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhPslsc10hldXEhJV6TfJgqY_alRaboN3sAVZZ0p65P5ZEKy6vS2Md2_fQXQMaj-DLLUD7C44sNYtdjT-Yf-MhZFMiLI3HXRSz3Q8vJry71gfiaVuiTshyphenhyphen599s7CxakPdJ2b-VU0fLUFCC/s1600-h/Cash_Falling_from_the_Sky.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 163px; height: 136px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhPslsc10hldXEhJV6TfJgqY_alRaboN3sAVZZ0p65P5ZEKy6vS2Md2_fQXQMaj-DLLUD7C44sNYtdjT-Yf-MhZFMiLI3HXRSz3Q8vJry71gfiaVuiTshyphenhyphen599s7CxakPdJ2b-VU0fLUFCC/s400/Cash_Falling_from_the_Sky.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5319462721447721970" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="font-size:180%;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;font-family:arial;font-size:85%;" >Putting </span><span style="font-family: times new roman;font-family:arial;font-size:85%;" >back the </span><span style="font-family: times new roman;font-family:arial;font-size:85%;" >sense in your</span></span><span style=";font-family:arial;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="font-family: times new roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: times new roman;font-size:85%;" >purse</span><span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="font-family: times new roman;">!!!</span></span><br /></span><span style=";font-family:arial;font-size:78%;" ><span style="font-family: times new roman;">What does money values nowadays...?</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">Well as a matter of fact I does think that the value of money is too little to be bargain for.</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">Huhuhuhu, Im actually broke at this very moment..</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">People..join me & let's check out the sum of fortune I had in hand right now..</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">Umm.. Ive got about 10 bucks in purse..with two of my atm card already at its limit..</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">(atm card and not credit card ok..heard me correctly!!)</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">...& no other saving or watsoever..<br /><br /></span><span style="font-family: times new roman;">So mom..dad.. just kindly give away ur money to me daily!! (Hahaha..useless daughter)</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">Luckily, the semester is already at near end..</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">Darn...how did I ended up in total mess??</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">Well, I noe..I noe..</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">no one to blame except myself, me...& me..,me again.me.me.me.me.me.me.meeee!!</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">As an example I went on a frenzy movie spree just this very Monday!!</span><br /><span style="font-family: times new roman;">...doing marathon for 3 movies..frm 4.30 to 11.00.. (x all legal!!)</span><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: times new roman;font-family:arial;font-size:78%;" >...wooohoo...looopy me!!...<br /></span><span style="font-family: times new roman;font-family:arial;font-size:78%;" >(gratitude to midvalley & gsc for sucking up every last note in my purse!!)<br /><br />Conclusion people... - Damage control....!!<br />...As now onwards, I decided today that I'll not to be tempted again..!!<br />..in watever form the temptation comes...<br />..either in advertisement form or human friends </span><span style="font-family: times new roman;font-family:arial;font-size:78%;" >like </span><span style="font-size:180%;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family: times new roman;font-family:arial;font-size:78%;" >form .. (lurve my friends tho!!)<br />..spending money recklessly is a big no-no from now on..<br />..dun ask why??.. Im completely broke ok!!..<br /><br />Sometimes ago someone did send me an sms that sounds like this..<br /><span style="font-style: italic;">"You are what you spend your money on"<br /></span>..owwhh,please.. its not really true cause if so I'm a complete entertainment-freak-selfish-brute!!<br />..and Im not...<br />..to tell the truth I picture myself as someone nice, friendly & a bit crazy sometimes..<br />...don't you think so?!!..hahahaa (perasan giler)<br /><br />Solution people...- saving and turning up an extra income!!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span><br /></span></span>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-78461601514506102432009-03-29T14:58:00.000+08:002009-04-01T05:03:54.927+08:00Earth Hour : Purely symbolical acts and what it signifies?!!!<a style="color: rgb(255, 255, 51);" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4wBx5SCFw169Gz3RIitcWhjI8_au8gsTPCRiGRPMfJ0NyGwdDIvxGyJ01lkyE1nQLGqkAWcrQgYKxRQruwug1JXFsfoRiCoqvjTnid19CfmPbheEem7HOY508Qrt0j5KmSolfeEpT2L3f/s1600-h/3393411859_1fabb83d9e.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 139px; height: 180px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4wBx5SCFw169Gz3RIitcWhjI8_au8gsTPCRiGRPMfJ0NyGwdDIvxGyJ01lkyE1nQLGqkAWcrQgYKxRQruwug1JXFsfoRiCoqvjTnid19CfmPbheEem7HOY508Qrt0j5KmSolfeEpT2L3f/s400/3393411859_1fabb83d9e.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5318508169873347538" border="0" /></a> <span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 51);font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-size:180%;">Lighten up </span>or </span><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" ><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 51);font-size:130%;" ><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-size:180%;" >darken down</span>, <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">whichever </span></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);font-size:130%;" >takes your </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 51);font-size:130%;" ><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">fancy</span>??!!....</span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />It's symbolical, but that's not all.<br /></span><br /></span><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" >Turning the lights off for an hour last Saturday at 8.30pm is a small, simple act that is easy to publicise and the results is highly visible to be observe. And, best of all, WWF had claim that the action makes a positive and even measurable contribution to the core issue – reducing emissions.<br />Sounds great haaaa...???!!!!<br />But does it really<span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);"> </span><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">reduces the emissions</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);"> </span>of the <span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">green house effects</span>???<br /></span><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" >This had kept me wondering for last night when I lost in thought watching the lights goes off from the prided skyscraper of KLCC....(not mentioning I'm surfing internet outside the balcony during that time..obviously <span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);">x participating in earth hour</span>) Hahahaha......kantoi...!!!! But what's wrong with that?<br /><br />Well, my act does state what I feel about this issue. Come on guys...this whole campaign is just a symbolical act.<br />So don't curse me for not voting.<br />But then again this symbolical acts makes me thinking what is the relevance and significant of those act??<br /><br />On my own account, I just dont do it for the fact that I <span style="color: rgb(51, 204, 0);">realy..realy..hate darkness</span>.<br />Call it selfish or what but darkness is one thing that i can't cope with....<br />(<span style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);">thinking bout the boogey man</span> whose lurking around get on my nerves...<span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">SPOOKKYY</span>)<br />Personally I detest earth hour as </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);font-size:130%;" >darkness </span><span style="font-size:130%;">evokes feelings of <span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 255);">danger and insecurity</span>.<br />Plusss....<span style="font-family:times new roman;">I personally think that by switching off light does'nt really help reducing watever they were claiming.</span><br /><span style="font-family:times new roman;">Do u really think that <span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">one hour</span> does change the state of our worlds right now?<br />By switching off the light can the global warming be stop?<br />Does the emission of CO2 be reduces?<br />Does it put back the lives of the trees that has been cut down?<br />Does it going to prevent the melting of the ice cap in the North & South poles?<br /><br />Personally, the answer is <span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 51);">no</span>....hahaha..unless we make it longer...let say <span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">one day </span>(now..that really is sumthing)<br />As for only one hour the.... power industry and big industry will keep their production as they always keep spare capacity that will keep their turbines spinning......( tenaga simpanan la yek secara mudahnye)<br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 0);">Conclusion, if the industry had'nt be stop or control then how we r going to reduce watever that we want to???<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:lucida grande;" ><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);">None the least, this earth hour thing </span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:times new roman;"><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:lucida grande;" ><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);">really </span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:times new roman;"><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:lucida grande;" ><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);">does reduce the power consumption ?!!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);">That a fact that cant be deny...but how much can we save in just one hour....obviously not much right!!!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);">But the one thing I like about this earth hour thing is that for some of us it open the oppurtunity</span> </span></span></span></span><span style="font-family:lucida grande;"><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);">to appreciate the awesome beauty of the starry night sky......(only if the rain not pouring down!!!)</span><br />........Hehehehe...does'nt that increase the romantics side of a person......:><br />As addition, that one hour might educate our younger generation<br />( older one like me is already to condemned to be fix....hahaha)<br />to reflect our growing "need" to turn on lights and appliances.</span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;">Soooo... </span></span><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" >in term of public awareness...we might realize we really don't need to use so many or to use them so often.<br /><br />Yeeeeaayy..would a day come where we can be free from electricity ???!!<br /></span><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" >Yet better...maybe a few of us will re-discover the<span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);"> </span><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">joys of conservation</span> for a short...<br />while having no television to turn on at the flick of a switch.</span><div class="pluck-comment-body" style="font-family:lucida grande;"><p><span style="font-size:130%;">I suggest we make it a day...no a week, not an hour!!!!!</span></p><p><span style="font-size:130%;">This maybe only a symbolic vote....<br />but it is a vote that has some tangible effect!!!!<br />this is a unifying act that demonstrates the strength of individual feeling....</span></p><span style="font-size:130%;">Big applause for those parcipitating in Earth Hour and booooo to myself!!<br />But still ignorance is better than indifference right<br />(try sticking up the wet thread..!!..huhu)<br />Thats all & c ya in next update!!<br /><br /></span></div><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /><br /></span><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span></div><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /><br /></span></div><span style=";font-family:lucida grande;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /><br /></span><span style="font-family:Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br /></span>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2602602045475826100.post-23093076734397824632009-03-29T01:26:00.000+08:002009-04-01T05:04:29.948+08:00Conquering the world with apathy and words!!!<div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:78%;" ><a style="font-family: georgia;" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgcaQpoTX1brHhQnXH1QaPu-UUP5ec0SL2F1mDHSL9INQzneuCne9kQ8jSgeBe5Ql0K8H19HK5tl5S8qMZrAFpVv8eMCe1JcDvScPL23yXyIbXrbyeJ2G-BKJYMj8T_dEPYkgmqagoCpxb/s1600-h/DSC00911.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 239px; height: 166px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgcaQpoTX1brHhQnXH1QaPu-UUP5ec0SL2F1mDHSL9INQzneuCne9kQ8jSgeBe5Ql0K8H19HK5tl5S8qMZrAFpVv8eMCe1JcDvScPL23yXyIbXrbyeJ2G-BKJYMj8T_dEPYkgmqagoCpxb/s400/DSC00911.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5318292554915608450" border="0" /></a></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">Finally, after all the wishy washy thought of starting my own blog..I finally made one....!!!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">Pheeeeewwww!!??</span><br /> <span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);font-size:85%;" >Okies, peeps!! Here goes my very first post..!! Actually, I dun have anything to tell currently so just brace urself with my complete craps..!! Watch out people coz I just bout to deliberate cranky and crappy tales for ur reading. Warning people, dont judge the spurs of words appearing on ur screen coz its juz my honest thought. Juz stop reading if u dont like it ok??<br />Hahaha..OMG, I lurve doing this!!<br /> How Im going to explain my feeling at this state as I typing out the words...??<br />...well its like..did u ever remember back when u r small u used to be very happy with very simple act such serving urself with a huge ice cream cone or perhaps a bar of chocolate??<br />..the very sweet smell and yummy sensation that affects ur nerve and brain making u happy and cheerfull all day long..??<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">..& that people..., is my feeling at current state!!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">unfortunately..not for long..!! u noe bout the ice cream & sweet - toothache!!!!! (aauucchhh)</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">..so the same goes for the blog..it cant make me happy all the time so there is a time where I</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);"> will stop posting up mw words and thought for awhile...</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">..cant really tell the reason..maybe Ill be away..maybe Im getting bored of it..maybe i dont have anything to write on..maybe there is no internet line...maybe Im tired of it...maybe i've been busy...maybe....etc..etc...etc..etc...</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">See...??? There is thousand possibilities, cant really be the same reason..</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">But I do hope that I'll constantly and continuously posting up my words up here..!!!!</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">As this is my firs post lets just make it short.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">Dont wanna tired u out ...</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">First impression last forever right (hahaha..poyo jek:>)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">Actually I wanna keep on writing but had been taken over by apathy laaaa...</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">ngantuk sudah......wanna go sleep..</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">Hahaha...actually to be frank I dun really care if no one reading up my post or visiting my blogs coz the real reason why I start this blogging this is because.....</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">...I had double personality as I'm quite a reserved and shy in person so most of the time I'll suppress my feelings and thoughts....</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">..once in awhile I need to resurface the hidden me (a hideous me)..of coz not in front of anyone..</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">..so i thought why not everytime I wanna tell bout the untold story I go blogging...</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">..so i thought why not everytime Im frustated I told someone through blogging..</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">..so I thought why not everytime I feel like sharing my feeling, thought and stand.....u noe laa!!</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">seee??!!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">Its quite a goood way to let out the unspoken words hidden inside me in a form of another me..</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">I dun really think u people understand wat Im talking bout!!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">My words looks like Im talking to myself...iz it?!!! uuhh..eerr..</span></span><br /><div style="text-align: center; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">FREAKY MEEEEE!!!<br /><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div></div><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 204);">ok2..enough of it..</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 204);">Should end this by now!! </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 204);">Tc and see u in the next update!!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 204);">But b4 that sorry for the unperfect english(kind of berkarat aleady..haha) and also for the non grammatic sentence that emerge into a grandma like noisy chatter!!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 204);">See yaaa...</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 204);"> </span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span>Lost withinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12221949888385781693noreply@blogger.com1